No matter your political views; Democrat or Republican; Liberal or Conservative; Moderate or Extremist, we can agree that only in America can what just happened in November, happen. Furthermore, I'd like to thank President Bush for making it possible for Barack Obama to be the next President of the United States. Those who know me will be very surprised that I am thanking President Bush, considering my opinion of his performance in office over the past 8 years (that comment will be a long posting, all by itself). The reason I am thanking President Bush needs to be looked at from a recent historical point of view.
If Gore had been President, the events on 9/11 would, in all probability, have happened as they did. However, we would not be in Iraq, we may still be in Afghanistan, but the world would be very different. Certainly, the environmental issues that we face would be happening, but the response by our elected officials, headed by a president like Gore would have been much stronger. Our reliance on foreign oil would probably have been the same, but there likely would have been more governmental request and support for more environmental friendly energy sources. Research and development on solar energy and stem cells would be 8 years further than they are now. And I know, that there would be no necessity for a debate on the legality of "Water boarding" as an acceptable method of torture in the United States of America! (That WILL be a posting for another time).
The political climate in the U.S., probably would have been very similar to the way it was under Clinton...
If Kerry had been elected and started to bring the political direction of our country back towards the center as compared to the far right swing by Bush/Cheney during their first 4 years, the majority of liberals, Democrats and moderate Republicans would have become complacent once again. The war in Iraq would have been viewed as it is now, as a mistake (a very costly, counter-productive, mismanaged, ill-conceived and poorly planned mistake... sorry for the editorial comment) and would have been ending. Environmental issues would have become once again important to our government, as stem cell research and solar energy would.
And once again, the political climate in the U.S., probably would have been very similar to the way it was under Clinton...
So then... Why, you may ask, am I thanking President Bush?
Because it took our country to be in the situation it is in now...
- Two wars in Afghanistan and Iraq;
- Our climate changing, causing floods and draughts;
- Corporate greed out of control ie. ENRON, AIG et.al.;
- The possible bankruptcy of our automobile industry;
- A class struggle between the "Haves and the Have-Nots" that we have not experienced since the 1920's (and the 1st Great Depression)
-and of course lets not forget the current financial disaster...
to put racism, prejudice and fear behind it and use the courage that it has always had...
It came through and showed the world what we Americans have always done.
We did the right thing...
WE elected a true American!
No where in this world, no other country could this happen!
When I say "True" American, I mean just that.
Look at him...
He is not Black or White... He is BOTH.
He is Christian, but with a Muslim name who supports Israel's right to exist.
He comes from a poor single parent household and raised by his maternal Grandmother.
He put himself through college.
He graduated Harvard and was the first Black man to be the President of the Harvard Law Review!
He could have done anything!
How many Wall Street Corporations must have salivated over the prospect of a Barack Obama!
How much would a prestigious law firm have offered him to join them?
High six figures? You Bet!
As a Harvard graduate, he had the world at his feet and could anyone blame him for taking that big brass ring?
Or going for the money?
He sure put in his dues... He sure worked hard for it.... I'm sure a lot harder than some others...
But he didn't...
He became a community activist...
The type of person that works for people who are poor and have very little political clout...
the type of person mocked by Sarah Palin (OK I'll stop editorializing for now) a low paid community activist vs. a high paid lawyer...
says a little about the man's character... don't you think?
I don't know if I would have gone for the big bucks either.
Oh who am I kidding...
I would have jumped at the chance for big bucks over community activism...
But that's me...
How many men have had similar upbringings as our new President and have gone down a much different path?
If you wrote a screenplay about his life, it would be rejected because he would be too much of an "everyman".
There is a little piece of each of us Americans in Barack Obama and maybe that is why we can all identify with him so... that little piece of each of us reflected back to us in his eyes, his smile.
He is calm, confident and focused in the face of a job that is...
well, challenging doesn't quite describe it now does it?
and in actuality, why anyone wants to be President is beyond me, but... Barack Obama does...
And I think, after listening to him....
he just may be the one American that can get us out of the mess we're are ALL in.
I for one will, along with my prayers at night, add a little addendum, for our new President...
Who know... if we all put a little prayer out there for him, even if you don't believe in prayer'
(I never used to) he and we will turn this messed up world around.
Peace!
Garry
Sunday, January 4, 2009
Metaphysicality - Part 3; Metaphysical Counseling
Synopsis,
In the 3rd posting in the series, I offer a definition and my philosophy on Metaphysics and how I have developed it into a therapeutic tool.
Metaphysical Counseling –
“Metaphysical” is defined by various dictionaries as “beyond the physical or beyond physics, dealing with the nature of being”. It deals with the exploration of what reality truly is. It suggests new, challenging and alternate realities than those generally held by the general public.
What is reality anyway?
Is it not simply your perspective of what you believe the “truth” to be?
Isn’t "reality" the truth that is believed by the society you live in?
What IS a truth anyway?
Lots of questions, I know, but that’s what teachers, good teachers do…
ask more questions and give less answers.
If I ask you and you determine what the (your) truth is then I earned my paycheck, until the next question comes and we start again…
Let’s look at a “fact”…
The Earth is in an orbit around the sun, PERIOD. A Fact!
There are nine planets including ours that orbit our sun which is a star in the Milky Way, PERIOD. A Fact!
ooops… They just demoted Pluto (not the Disney Cartoon dog) the planet, is no longer a plant it’s… errr… something else…
“Ok kids, you know our science books that we have had since your parents were here in our school? …
Lets just disregard the fact about Pluto…”
Get my point?
Six hundred years ago the world was Flat, PERIOD. A Fact!
Then it took Columbus to turn the world A-round.
Can your reality change when viewed through a different set of eyes?
And so, introduce to you a “newer” truth?
And If this new truth, makes more sense than your old belief and you feel better and happier with this new belief…
Well, isn’t that what education, growth and maturity is all about? Becoming aware of and the acceptance of new ideas (truths).
Many regard Metaphysics as a spiritual philosophy of life. It can be more accurately regarded as a spiritual exploration, which focuses on discovering who you truly are; an immortal soul, having a human experience.
There is no conflict with your religious belief, it simply allows you to expand your religious beliefs to grow and encompass more of what your soul is all about.
Religion doesn’t and shouldn’t have to be so restrictive and inflexible as to prevent your soul from the growth, knowledge and advancement it came to the physical world to experience.
Metaphysics embraces and respects all religions and belief systems and is based on the underlying common belief inherent in all religions, which is that there is a greater power than us.
However, there are times when the “human factor” can have a negative impact on religion in general. This conflict between religion, politics, relationships, the stress of physical life and the inner truth that is part of each human soul is where Metaphysical Counseling is so beneficial.
Unfortunately, in human society, with so much indifference, poverty, disease, genocide, war, prejudice, crime and man’s inhumanity to man, it is not surprising that so many people doubt the existence of any “God”.
Equally unfortunate is how more and more people have become so callused and hardened to the existence of a higher power. Questions like,
“What can one person do?” or
“If there is a God why would he allow (fill in the blank) to happen?”, reflect a growing feeling that there is no God, no soul, no heaven.
It becomes easier to simply believe that when you die, you’re gone, in the ground… dust to dust and that’s it. That view of what “it” is all about can lead to severe depression. Put very simply, Metaphysical beliefs state that each soul comes into the human body as a child goes to kindergarten, to learn.
We are living in a very exciting time of spiritual transformation and evolutionary changes in human consciousness. It is important to feel that you are supported, encouraged and nurtured as you discover your own spiritual awareness and the growth that this awareness promotes.
I have combined the therapeutic use of hypnosis and Mediumship into this process that I call “Metaphysical Counseling”.
In a session I may use one of the following different hypnotic techniques including,
“The 4 Parts of Self”
While in a hypnotic state, you are directed to your “Spiritual Sanctuary”, where you sit, facing four chairs. In each from left to right, your Physical, Emotional, Intellectual and Spiritual Self, each in turn, tell you what you need to hear for your happiness and well being.
“Seeing the Spark”
While in a hypnotic state, you become your own Medium. I have you sit in your Spiritual Sanctuary. In the distance you become aware of a spark of light that comes closer and forms the shape of the past loved one that you want to contact and allow them to give you their message to you.
“Hearing Your Higher Self”
While in a hypnotic state, you have a conversation with your own higher self, to ask him/her questions and learn your life’s purpose.
I combine these hypnotic exercises with a Mediumship reading, similar to the “Connecting with Loved Ones in Spirit” Workshop and/or Circle. When Metaphysical Counseling is combined with hypnotherapy, the results can be inspiring.
For more information on Metaphysical topics, look at my Reading List http://www.hyp4life.com/reading_list.htm in particular, the work of authors Dr. Brian Weiss- (Many Lives, Many Masters), Neale Donald Walsch - ( Conversations with God ), James Redfield- ( The Celestine Prophesy ) and Jane Roberts- (The Seth Books)
The next posting, Metaphysicality - Part 4; Mediumship will be posted on Sunday, January 11, 2009
Post a comment, I’ll be happy to reply
Tuesday, December 30, 2008
Metaphysicality parts 3-5;
Metaphysical Counseling, Mediumship and ESP
On my website http://www.hyp4life.com/, I have a page titled
“Metaphysical Counseling and Mediumship”
http://www.hyp4life.com/metaphysical.htm
I have broken that page into 3 separate postings in the Metaphysicality Series.
I felt that the subjects on that page needed more explaination, so I will expand upon three subjects;
-Metaphysical Counseling,
-Mediumship and
-ESP/psychic abilities.
The third posting in the Metaphysicality series titled
Metaphysicality- Part 3; Metaphysical Counseling,
will be posted on Sunday January 4, 2009.
The fourth posting in the Metaphysicality series titled
Metaphysicality- Part 4; Mediumship
will be posted on Sunday January 11, 2009.
The fifth posting in the Metaphysicality series titled
Metaphysicality- Part 5; ESP and Psychic Abilities
be posted on Sunday January 18, 2009.
Monday, December 29, 2008
Metaphysicality - Part 2;
“We Are All Psychic”
Synopsis;
This is the 2nd posting for the Metaphysicality article. In this posting I discuss that we are all psychic. How we can lose our ability and how I lost my abilities at five. How we all actually have six senses, not just five and how we are all six sense human beings. How I began to regain my psychic abilities.
Metaphysicality Part 2 – “We Are All Psychic”
“We are all psychic!”
How often have you heard that? Often, right?
Usually it is from someone who is (or claims to be) psychic. Well it’s true. It is as natural as the ability to sense with our five senses. However, many people who are cynical about Extra Sensory Perception feel that if there is no sensory organ involved, like an eye or ear, then what we perceive cannot be “real”, they would attribute psychic perceptions to imagination or fraud and trickery.
My argument would be that our (human) eyes can only distinguish a very narrow band of the light spectrum. We cannot see in the infra-red, for example but that doesn’t mean those colors (vibrations) are not there; it is simply that the human eye can’t see it. A dog’s sense of smell and hearing are much more sensitive than a human’s, but we don’t deny that they can sense better than we do or deny their ability.
So, let’s assume that some of us have a more developed Extra Sensory ability commonly known as ESP. We assume that these individuals are in some way more advanced, enlightened or “special” than we are. They are viewed in different ways, from being “gifted” to being viewed as different or weird. I have to tell you that we are all human with all the same sensing abilities.
You may say that there are ONLY 5 senses because there are only five sensory organs; the eyes, ears, nose, tongue and skin. However, I am a firm believer that we have been unaware of a very important sensory organ. We all have one, but we do not recognize it as a sensory organ. It is located in the middle of our forehead and it is attached to the most amazing and complicated organ on the planet; the human brain. It is even referred to by many as an organ and it is called our “Third Eye”. Through this organ we can perceive more than the five senses we are comfortable with. In the 3rd Metaphysicality posting I will go further into what makes us all psychic.
Children are born with their third eye, wide open. They go through their early lives (birth through about three) with the ability to sense spirit easily and naturally. It is usually the society (and family in particular) the makes the children feel as if it is not normal to communicate with spirit.
As I said in my first posting, I lost my psychic abilities at the age of 5. When I was seeing an old man in my bedroom every night and I can tell you I did not want to be psychic. I would sleep with the pillow over my head, praying that the spirit of the old man would not be there when I awoke.
Then over a period of weeks, he wasn’t there any longer. You may have heard that young children are unaware of the difference between the living and the spirits of those who pass. This is true. I did not want to see spirits any longer and my desire to no longer see them along with the spirits’ acceptance of my desire stopped the visions from happening. The process is called “veiling over” and every one of us who are no longer able to communicate with spirit, have veiled over.
I was very happy from the age of 5 until my early 50’s being a cynic. I laughed at anyone who even mentioned the existence of a soul. I was content in my Darwinian existence; that there was nothing after we die except blackness and our bodies simply turn back into the dust that they came from. Then there came a time when I became curious about ESP. I was watching John Edward on the TV and could not explain how he fooled his audience into thinking and actually believing that he was talking to their loved ones in spirit. But the more I investigated the more convinced I became that my cynicism was unnecessary ant misguided.
After working with Dr. Brian Weiss at a weeklong workshop on Past Life Regressions and meeting a few gifted mediums, I decided to see if I could get the abilities that I ignored and dismissed for so long, back. I soon learned that psychic abilities never truly leave. The ability to communicate with spirit, that I simply attributed to my imagination came back quickly (because I never lost them).
I have only accepted that I am psychic over the last 6 years. I began with basic psychic development classes and was amazed with the images and feelings I was receiving. I was able to “read” perfect strangers with an accuracy that actually shocked me.
In Metaphysicality Part 3- "Metaphysical Counseling and Mediumship", scheduled to be posted on 1/10/2009, I will describe how I feel, hear, see and communicate with the spirits of the people who come to our circle and how I sometimes hear them when I am not really trying to ( in classrooms, and restaurants, etc.) I have been to the many psychic development workshops offered at Metaphysical churches such as the ISD in Sparta ( http://www.isd-sparta.org/ ) and the Journey Within in Pompton Lakes ( http://www.thejourneywithin.org/ ) and will continue to develop this natural ability we all have.
Synopsis;
This is the 2nd posting for the Metaphysicality article. In this posting I discuss that we are all psychic. How we can lose our ability and how I lost my abilities at five. How we all actually have six senses, not just five and how we are all six sense human beings. How I began to regain my psychic abilities.
Metaphysicality Part 2 – “We Are All Psychic”
“We are all psychic!”
How often have you heard that? Often, right?
Usually it is from someone who is (or claims to be) psychic. Well it’s true. It is as natural as the ability to sense with our five senses. However, many people who are cynical about Extra Sensory Perception feel that if there is no sensory organ involved, like an eye or ear, then what we perceive cannot be “real”, they would attribute psychic perceptions to imagination or fraud and trickery.
My argument would be that our (human) eyes can only distinguish a very narrow band of the light spectrum. We cannot see in the infra-red, for example but that doesn’t mean those colors (vibrations) are not there; it is simply that the human eye can’t see it. A dog’s sense of smell and hearing are much more sensitive than a human’s, but we don’t deny that they can sense better than we do or deny their ability.
So, let’s assume that some of us have a more developed Extra Sensory ability commonly known as ESP. We assume that these individuals are in some way more advanced, enlightened or “special” than we are. They are viewed in different ways, from being “gifted” to being viewed as different or weird. I have to tell you that we are all human with all the same sensing abilities.
You may say that there are ONLY 5 senses because there are only five sensory organs; the eyes, ears, nose, tongue and skin. However, I am a firm believer that we have been unaware of a very important sensory organ. We all have one, but we do not recognize it as a sensory organ. It is located in the middle of our forehead and it is attached to the most amazing and complicated organ on the planet; the human brain. It is even referred to by many as an organ and it is called our “Third Eye”. Through this organ we can perceive more than the five senses we are comfortable with. In the 3rd Metaphysicality posting I will go further into what makes us all psychic.
Children are born with their third eye, wide open. They go through their early lives (birth through about three) with the ability to sense spirit easily and naturally. It is usually the society (and family in particular) the makes the children feel as if it is not normal to communicate with spirit.
As I said in my first posting, I lost my psychic abilities at the age of 5. When I was seeing an old man in my bedroom every night and I can tell you I did not want to be psychic. I would sleep with the pillow over my head, praying that the spirit of the old man would not be there when I awoke.
Then over a period of weeks, he wasn’t there any longer. You may have heard that young children are unaware of the difference between the living and the spirits of those who pass. This is true. I did not want to see spirits any longer and my desire to no longer see them along with the spirits’ acceptance of my desire stopped the visions from happening. The process is called “veiling over” and every one of us who are no longer able to communicate with spirit, have veiled over.
I was very happy from the age of 5 until my early 50’s being a cynic. I laughed at anyone who even mentioned the existence of a soul. I was content in my Darwinian existence; that there was nothing after we die except blackness and our bodies simply turn back into the dust that they came from. Then there came a time when I became curious about ESP. I was watching John Edward on the TV and could not explain how he fooled his audience into thinking and actually believing that he was talking to their loved ones in spirit. But the more I investigated the more convinced I became that my cynicism was unnecessary ant misguided.
After working with Dr. Brian Weiss at a weeklong workshop on Past Life Regressions and meeting a few gifted mediums, I decided to see if I could get the abilities that I ignored and dismissed for so long, back. I soon learned that psychic abilities never truly leave. The ability to communicate with spirit, that I simply attributed to my imagination came back quickly (because I never lost them).
I have only accepted that I am psychic over the last 6 years. I began with basic psychic development classes and was amazed with the images and feelings I was receiving. I was able to “read” perfect strangers with an accuracy that actually shocked me.
In Metaphysicality Part 3- "Metaphysical Counseling and Mediumship", scheduled to be posted on 1/10/2009, I will describe how I feel, hear, see and communicate with the spirits of the people who come to our circle and how I sometimes hear them when I am not really trying to ( in classrooms, and restaurants, etc.) I have been to the many psychic development workshops offered at Metaphysical churches such as the ISD in Sparta ( http://www.isd-sparta.org/ ) and the Journey Within in Pompton Lakes ( http://www.thejourneywithin.org/ ) and will continue to develop this natural ability we all have.
Sunday, December 7, 2008
Metaphysicality - Part 1
“Metaphysicality”
Part 1 of a continuing article
Please keep in mind that everything written in my blog is my opinion and not necessarily fact. This statement could be an interesting posting all by itself. I could argue that there is no such thing as a “fact”… The fact is that all facts are simply opinions held by the vast majority of a given population, waiting for a challenger to be an agent of change, arguing against a current paradigm and trying to make it “shift”. How about this fact… in the late 1400’s it was a “fact” that the world was flat, all it took was one man who challenged that given fact to turn the world “A-Round”. Think about it. But I digress…
Synopsis;
This is the first part (Part 1) of an ongoing article covering a variety of metaphysical topics. The main thread will be about my psychic and medium experiences but I may digress (which clearly, I often do). I am titling the article “Metaphysicality” which, although is not a real word, is fairly appropriate and accurate. According to my dictionary it means things related to Metaphysics. Some areas of Metaphysical interest that I plan on posting will be covering,
- Psychics and Mediums (like John Edward);
- Synchronicities;
- ESP;
- The “Claire” senses;
- Experiences at our “Connecting with Loved Ones” Psychic Circle (you can find more information on the circle on my website http://www.hyp4life.com/);
- How we are all psychic;
- How to develop your latent abilities;
- How I began to develop my abilities;
along with many other topics that are right now in the planning phase.
If you have questions about anything on my blog (or website), please post a comment and I will reply or I will write an article on the subject if a short reply is inadequate.
“Metaphysicality" - Part 1-
If you read my recent 3 part article “A Smokers Story”, which is about hypnosis and smoking, you learned that I have been involved with hypnotherapy for over 25 years and it is a passion. I can say that because, I feel no one would raise an eyebrow about that statement.
So, I am passionate about hypnotherapy…
You could say, "That’s fine, it’s his business, hypnotizing people for a variety of reasons and he loves what he is doing… more power to him."
Then why do I have such a hard time admitting to people about my “other” passion?
In the past, it has been very difficult for me to tell people that I am a Psychic/Medium.
So here goes… I’m a Psychic/Medium!
Wow that wasn’t that hard. Heck, It’s something I am passionate about so why the apprehension about telling people?
Anyway, there it is, I admit to it and not only did a say it but I wrote in my blog for you to read.
I have heard a lot of less than supportive comments, when I did admit to being psychic and perhaps that’s why I am reticent to tell others. I still feel that there are some eyebrows going up out there right now in cyber space. I can almost hear you (because I’m psychic, you know :) ) and I have heard a lot of this before.
“Yeah right! Your psychic… So what am I thinking?”
“Psychic!?... How about Psycho!?"
"You’re not a psychic... you are crazy though. Don't you know, there is no such thing as psychic”
or one I really love...
“I know how those guys work” as you put your hand to your forehead, “I have someone here… an S name, like Sam or Sol… No S?
I mean an R name like Robert or Richard… No R?
OK how about a T name… Somebody with a T name must have died! What’s wrong with you?”
Yes, I have heard it all and more. No wonder I am hesitant to tell people I am a Medium.
Let’s make a golf analogy about psychic/mediums…
John Edward is to Mediumship as Tiger Woods is to golf, both are at the top of their game; Sylvia Browne is Arnold Palmer, still can play but has gotten well… old.
Me? I am a really good amateur golfer. I shoot pars fairly consistently, but I need way more practice to go pro. My goal is to be like Tiger but par golf right now is feeling really good.
Know what I mean?
My psychic awareness started on the first night I slept in our new house. I was 5 years old when my parents bought our home and I was going to sleep in my new room for the first time. Just before I fell off to sleep, I became aware of an old man standing at the foot of my bed. As any child would do, I screamed at the top of my lungs and I do believe my neighbors a block away were woken out of a good sleep. My parents were in like a flash and for weeks told me no one was in my room, yet every night just before I fell asleep, I would become aware of someone in my room, only to open my eyes and once again see this old man.
Eventually, after many nights sleeping with my head under my pillow, I stopped seeing this old man. That is not to say he was not there, I just stopped seeing him.
For all you parents out there. If you child says he or she is seeing “someone” or “something”, don’t automatically assume “imagination”. There are many more psychic children in the world lately. Ask them questions about what they perceived. Ask open ended questions, i.e. “What was this man wearing?” show support, concern and acceptance instead of annoyance, fear or apathy. Just because you don't see the spirit your child is seeing, doesn’t mean your child is imagining it, more than likely he/she is truly psychic, as we ALL are.
I plan on more entries on “Metaphysicality” the next posting will be titled “Metaphysicality Part 2, We Are All Psychic", look for it before Christmas.
Part 1 of a continuing article
Please keep in mind that everything written in my blog is my opinion and not necessarily fact. This statement could be an interesting posting all by itself. I could argue that there is no such thing as a “fact”… The fact is that all facts are simply opinions held by the vast majority of a given population, waiting for a challenger to be an agent of change, arguing against a current paradigm and trying to make it “shift”. How about this fact… in the late 1400’s it was a “fact” that the world was flat, all it took was one man who challenged that given fact to turn the world “A-Round”. Think about it. But I digress…
Synopsis;
This is the first part (Part 1) of an ongoing article covering a variety of metaphysical topics. The main thread will be about my psychic and medium experiences but I may digress (which clearly, I often do). I am titling the article “Metaphysicality” which, although is not a real word, is fairly appropriate and accurate. According to my dictionary it means things related to Metaphysics. Some areas of Metaphysical interest that I plan on posting will be covering,
- Psychics and Mediums (like John Edward);
- Synchronicities;
- ESP;
- The “Claire” senses;
- Experiences at our “Connecting with Loved Ones” Psychic Circle (you can find more information on the circle on my website http://www.hyp4life.com/);
- How we are all psychic;
- How to develop your latent abilities;
- How I began to develop my abilities;
along with many other topics that are right now in the planning phase.
If you have questions about anything on my blog (or website), please post a comment and I will reply or I will write an article on the subject if a short reply is inadequate.
“Metaphysicality" - Part 1-
If you read my recent 3 part article “A Smokers Story”, which is about hypnosis and smoking, you learned that I have been involved with hypnotherapy for over 25 years and it is a passion. I can say that because, I feel no one would raise an eyebrow about that statement.
So, I am passionate about hypnotherapy…
You could say, "That’s fine, it’s his business, hypnotizing people for a variety of reasons and he loves what he is doing… more power to him."
Then why do I have such a hard time admitting to people about my “other” passion?
In the past, it has been very difficult for me to tell people that I am a Psychic/Medium.
So here goes… I’m a Psychic/Medium!
Wow that wasn’t that hard. Heck, It’s something I am passionate about so why the apprehension about telling people?
Anyway, there it is, I admit to it and not only did a say it but I wrote in my blog for you to read.
I have heard a lot of less than supportive comments, when I did admit to being psychic and perhaps that’s why I am reticent to tell others. I still feel that there are some eyebrows going up out there right now in cyber space. I can almost hear you (because I’m psychic, you know :) ) and I have heard a lot of this before.
“Yeah right! Your psychic… So what am I thinking?”
“Psychic!?... How about Psycho!?"
"You’re not a psychic... you are crazy though. Don't you know, there is no such thing as psychic”
or one I really love...
“I know how those guys work” as you put your hand to your forehead, “I have someone here… an S name, like Sam or Sol… No S?
I mean an R name like Robert or Richard… No R?
OK how about a T name… Somebody with a T name must have died! What’s wrong with you?”
Yes, I have heard it all and more. No wonder I am hesitant to tell people I am a Medium.
Let’s make a golf analogy about psychic/mediums…
John Edward is to Mediumship as Tiger Woods is to golf, both are at the top of their game; Sylvia Browne is Arnold Palmer, still can play but has gotten well… old.
Me? I am a really good amateur golfer. I shoot pars fairly consistently, but I need way more practice to go pro. My goal is to be like Tiger but par golf right now is feeling really good.
Know what I mean?
My psychic awareness started on the first night I slept in our new house. I was 5 years old when my parents bought our home and I was going to sleep in my new room for the first time. Just before I fell off to sleep, I became aware of an old man standing at the foot of my bed. As any child would do, I screamed at the top of my lungs and I do believe my neighbors a block away were woken out of a good sleep. My parents were in like a flash and for weeks told me no one was in my room, yet every night just before I fell asleep, I would become aware of someone in my room, only to open my eyes and once again see this old man.
Eventually, after many nights sleeping with my head under my pillow, I stopped seeing this old man. That is not to say he was not there, I just stopped seeing him.
For all you parents out there. If you child says he or she is seeing “someone” or “something”, don’t automatically assume “imagination”. There are many more psychic children in the world lately. Ask them questions about what they perceived. Ask open ended questions, i.e. “What was this man wearing?” show support, concern and acceptance instead of annoyance, fear or apathy. Just because you don't see the spirit your child is seeing, doesn’t mean your child is imagining it, more than likely he/she is truly psychic, as we ALL are.
I plan on more entries on “Metaphysicality” the next posting will be titled “Metaphysicality Part 2, We Are All Psychic", look for it before Christmas.
Sunday, November 16, 2008
"A Smokers Story; Trying Hypnosis” part 3 of 3
Synopsis;
This is the third of a 3-part article, which is about my battle with smoking. In this posting, I describe why I decided to try hypnosis to quit smoking; how I became aware of the part of me that was responsible for smoking. I describe my hypnosis experience and the amazing results; the complete elimination of my desire to smoke.
"A Smokers Story; Trying Hypnosis” part 3 of 3
- My Last Cigarette -
The last cigarette I ever smoked was on February 6, 1985 at 1:45pm, in front of an office building in Huntington, Long Island, New York.
I looked at the directions on the piece of paper that was on the seat of my car. "Long Island Expressway East to Rt. 110 North, Huntington..." During the hour and a half drive from Staten Island to Huntington, Long Island, I had smoked half a pack of cigarettes. Although I was determined never to smoke again, a part of me was very resistant to this healthy decision. I pulled into the parking lot, parked the car and got out. Pacing and smoking in the parking lot, I was all too aware that it was 1:45 pm and my appointment was at 2:00.
The chill of that February wind was cutting through my parka and I thought how nice it would be, not having to go outside to smoke these cursed things any longer. However, until then, I was going to smoke the hell out of them. As I took my last drag from my last Marlboro Light 100, I felt many emotions all at the same time. These were conflicting emotions. The thoughts going through my head were equally conflicted. I felt that I was about to lose my best friend. My cigarettes were always there for me.
They were consistent in a very inconsistent world.
They always looked the same.
They always smelled the same.
They always tasted the same; I could always rely on them.
When I was nervous, they calmed me.
When I was hungry, they took the edge off my appetite.
When I was stressed, they relaxed me.
When I was bored, they gave me things to do with my hands.
They told people not to mess with me, "I’m a smoker, I’m a tough guy".
Nevertheless, I also knew that these "friends" killed my father, who died of lung cancer after years of smoking. I was intelligent enough to know, that given time, my cigarettes would kill me too. I knew that I couldn’t walk up a flight of stairs without wheezing. I started each day by coughing for five minutes, until I coughed up the yellow mucus that was stuck deep down in my lungs. I knew that I couldn’t handle this ordeal of trying to stop this habit any longer. I knew that the past year had been the worst year in my life and it was all because of my friend, Mr. Marlboro Light 100’s.
However, most importantly, I knew that I had made a promise to my son Aaron and I had visions of the tears in his eyes. Similar to the tears that welled in my eyes, fourteen years earlier as I saw my father die, after lung cancer ravaged his body.
I could picture Aaron in front of my coffin, the same way I had stood in front of my father's.
I could feel his pain… his anger!
His anger with me, that I continued to smoke while knowing it, was going to kill me.
I could feel his anger at me because I chose my addiction to, my love of tobacco over the love of my family!
The same anger I felt at my father for never listening to me, when I pleaded with him to stop smoking.
The same helplessness I felt, to see the strongest man I knew shrivel up like the cigarettes he smoked.
You might ask, how stupid was it for me to witness my father’s death from lung cancer and still became a three pack a day smoker… how do you explain that. I don’t know if there could be an adequate explanation. It is a testament to the ability of the American Tobacco Companies, who were able to get me to become a three pack a day smoker, after seeing what smoking did to my father.
I decided at that moment that this hypnosis stuff must work... would work! I pictured myself driving home to Staten Island, later that day as an ex-smoker. I would not put my son through what I went through. I would quit today. I exhaled the smoke from my lungs, looked at the filter of that Marlboro Light 100, my "friend"… dropped in on the concrete sidewalk, in front of that office and crushed it under my foot.
As I walked up the stairs to the second floor, I did not know what to expect. I had a basic understanding, that hypnosis works with the part of your mind that makes you smoke. I had no idea how the experience would change my life so profoundly and in so many different ways.
The door to the office was open and I walked in and hung my parkas on the coat rack.
The office waiting room was 15’ X 20’. There were a few chairs and a few coffee tables. As I walked around the office, I noticed that the walls were covered with thank-you letters. Some were type written, some hand written all describing the results of their hypnotic experience. It seemed that Al (the hypnotherapist) did more than help people stop smoking; he used hypnosis for a lot more. Although the majority of thank-you letters were from ex-smokers, there were many letters from professional golf players, nail biters, and stutters, along with articles about hypnosis. The information I read about hypnosis made me even more curious and impressed with the subject of hypnotherapy.
This would be my first experience with hypnosis and the questioning and doubt about the hypnosis process started in earnest. The doubt and concern was caused by a part of my subconscious that I now call the “Smoker Part”. This part began to strongly let its presence known, making me doubt if hypnosis would work for me. The inner voice in my head urged me to stop this useless attempt to quit smoking. It was threatened by this process and would do whatever it could to get me to either stop or fail in my quest to quit smoking. I was quite used to my smoker part. Over the past year, I had tried to quit multiple times and it was this smoker part that consistently pushed me back to smoking. That was its job; keeping me smoking and he did it oh so well.
The office was quiet except for the muffed sound of voices from the other side of a door. Behind that door, Al was hypnotizing another smoker and my smoker part and I knew we were to be next. I had mixed feelings with the decision to quit smoking. The logical, intelligent, reasonable part of my mind wanted me to quit, but the smoker in me still refused to let me become the non-smoker I wanted to be. Then the door opened and a woman walked out, thanking Al for all he had done. Al walked out behind her, saying that a thank-you was nice but a letter for his wall would be even nicer.
Al was about 5’5” and 220 pounds. He had a long scraggly beard and wore a “Harvard” sweatshirt. He introduced himself to me after his previous client left and we went into his back office where I was directed to sit. We spoke for an extended period about hypnosis, smoking, addictions and more. He asked me to sit on a recliner with new age music playing in the background. Then it was time for hypnosis.
I pushed back on the recliner and got into a comfortable position enjoying the softness of the leather, as he began to describe relaxing my body, starting from the top of my head. As Al asked me to relax the muscles in my face, my mind had a different idea; it was not going to oblige. Relaxation was not what it wanted; tension was.
“Who is this guy?” the voice in my head said, referring to the hypnotist.
My smoker part was not going to give up this addiction without a fight. As in the past, it threw up more and more walls, trying to make me ignore the truth; that I wanted to and needed to quit.
“Don’t listen to this weirdo!” My smoker part screamed in my head.
“If he is such a great hypnotist, why doesn’t he hypnotize himself into losing some weight?”
“A real professional!” sarcasm dripping from the voice.
“A sweatshirt?”
“Really!”
“How about a shirt and a tie?”
“What if he is a weirdo? I’m not going to close my eyes!”
The sound of the smoker in my head was drowning out Al’s voice.
Then it got even weirder. Instead of one voice in my head; the smoker telling me to continue to smoke and get out of the office, another voice came into my mind.
“Shhhh…” it said,
“You just spent $350 on this. It worked for Nick. You have an opportunity to end your year from hell, right now… and what about Aaron?”
This new voice calmed me; I stopped fighting and doubting.
“Give Al a chance to help you quit; you know it’s what you really want” it said.
This new voice helped me remember what I truly wanted… to finally and permanently quit smoking.
I finally quieted the smoker part of me, and as soon as I did, I felt a wonderful feeling of confidence and resolve wash over me. This new voice replaced the smoker’s voice. It was the voice of my “Healthy Part”, it was very welcome and I embraced it, listened to it and followed its direction.
I quickly started to feel as if I were falling asleep. The more Al spoke the harder it was for me to keep my eyes open. Although I felt a slight tingling feeling and I was slightly cold, I was very relaxed, my thoughts were drifting but I heard everything being said. I found it curious that Al had said that I could not open my eyes and although I tried to open them, I couldn’t. He said I could not raise my arms and again, I tried but couldn’t. I was beginning to believe that it could…. would work.
Being in hypnosis was not what I had expected it to be. I was expecting a feeling like general anesthesia. I expected to feel… different. I expected…
Actually, I did not really know what to expect.
Very soon, I was totally involved in the visual world Al was describing. He had me see a beautiful beach in the summer. I was alone sitting on a chair looking at the horizon.
He then had me see my future as a smoker and it wasn’t pretty.
After what seemed to be ten minutes (which turned out to be fifty) he said that he was going to bring me out of hypnosis. He said that when he said “five” after counting from “one”, my eyes would open and I would be wide-awake.
Amazingly, on the count of five my eyes did open. The process dumbfounded me. I was also concerned that, although I was relaxed and it felt very good, I actually doubted that I was hypnotized; I had heard everything said. I was expecting hypnosis to be a lot more impressive than it turned out to be. I prayed that it had worked, but I was dreading that it did not.
Driving home after the session ended, I was anxious.“When will the urge hit?” I had never driven by myself, in this car without a cigarette burning. Now I was cruising along the Long Island Expressway Westbound, on my way home and I dared to let myself think…
“Can I really be an ex-smoker!” The thought thrilled and scared me at the same time.
“Can it be this easy?” And it was.
“What if it doesn’t work?”
“What if an urge comes? Does that mean it didn’t work?”
The “What-if’s” were being asked all the way home.
I turned onto the entrance to the Verrazano Bridge and as I did a truck without using his signal, cut me off. As my road rage exploded, I felt my blood pressure jump, I cursed, I did a nasty gesture at him with my middle finger and yet, I found two minutes later, that I was laughing.
I looked at myself in the rearview mirror and realized that for the first time in years, I did not light up a cigarette when I was stressed. The urge just wasn’t there! It was not that I was repulsed by having a cigarette; I just didn’t have the urge!
I was an ex-smoker!
Over the next few days I started noticing the ashes, the burn marks on the seat of my car, the yellow haze on the windshield but most of all I noticed the smell in my car. When I got in the car, I realized what I had been subjecting my wife to. I began to realize how discourteous I was as a smoker. I also allowed myself to dream that I actually was an ex-smoker.
That weekend I cleaned my car and the ex-smoker that I am today, was born. To be honest, I had a few urges for a cigarette over the following weeks, but they were easy to resist and by the end of the month, I can say that I did not even think about smoking again. It has been almost 23 years and I can honestly, easily and confidently say that I will NEVER smoke again.
It was my first experience with hypnosis but far from my last. Again, this was before the Internet and I began to read all I could from the library on the amazing topic of hypnosis; the centuries old process that finally cured me of my tobacco addiction.
Little did I know at that time that in fifteen years, I would be going to hypnotherapy school and start a business called,
HYP4LIFE- Improving Your Life Through Hypnotherapy.
If you are a smoker and would like to quit smoking by using hypnotherapy, call me at
(908) 852-4635
This is the third of a 3-part article, which is about my battle with smoking. In this posting, I describe why I decided to try hypnosis to quit smoking; how I became aware of the part of me that was responsible for smoking. I describe my hypnosis experience and the amazing results; the complete elimination of my desire to smoke.
"A Smokers Story; Trying Hypnosis” part 3 of 3
- My Last Cigarette -
The last cigarette I ever smoked was on February 6, 1985 at 1:45pm, in front of an office building in Huntington, Long Island, New York.
I looked at the directions on the piece of paper that was on the seat of my car. "Long Island Expressway East to Rt. 110 North, Huntington..." During the hour and a half drive from Staten Island to Huntington, Long Island, I had smoked half a pack of cigarettes. Although I was determined never to smoke again, a part of me was very resistant to this healthy decision. I pulled into the parking lot, parked the car and got out. Pacing and smoking in the parking lot, I was all too aware that it was 1:45 pm and my appointment was at 2:00.
The chill of that February wind was cutting through my parka and I thought how nice it would be, not having to go outside to smoke these cursed things any longer. However, until then, I was going to smoke the hell out of them. As I took my last drag from my last Marlboro Light 100, I felt many emotions all at the same time. These were conflicting emotions. The thoughts going through my head were equally conflicted. I felt that I was about to lose my best friend. My cigarettes were always there for me.
They were consistent in a very inconsistent world.
They always looked the same.
They always smelled the same.
They always tasted the same; I could always rely on them.
When I was nervous, they calmed me.
When I was hungry, they took the edge off my appetite.
When I was stressed, they relaxed me.
When I was bored, they gave me things to do with my hands.
They told people not to mess with me, "I’m a smoker, I’m a tough guy".
Nevertheless, I also knew that these "friends" killed my father, who died of lung cancer after years of smoking. I was intelligent enough to know, that given time, my cigarettes would kill me too. I knew that I couldn’t walk up a flight of stairs without wheezing. I started each day by coughing for five minutes, until I coughed up the yellow mucus that was stuck deep down in my lungs. I knew that I couldn’t handle this ordeal of trying to stop this habit any longer. I knew that the past year had been the worst year in my life and it was all because of my friend, Mr. Marlboro Light 100’s.
However, most importantly, I knew that I had made a promise to my son Aaron and I had visions of the tears in his eyes. Similar to the tears that welled in my eyes, fourteen years earlier as I saw my father die, after lung cancer ravaged his body.
I could picture Aaron in front of my coffin, the same way I had stood in front of my father's.
I could feel his pain… his anger!
His anger with me, that I continued to smoke while knowing it, was going to kill me.
I could feel his anger at me because I chose my addiction to, my love of tobacco over the love of my family!
The same anger I felt at my father for never listening to me, when I pleaded with him to stop smoking.
The same helplessness I felt, to see the strongest man I knew shrivel up like the cigarettes he smoked.
You might ask, how stupid was it for me to witness my father’s death from lung cancer and still became a three pack a day smoker… how do you explain that. I don’t know if there could be an adequate explanation. It is a testament to the ability of the American Tobacco Companies, who were able to get me to become a three pack a day smoker, after seeing what smoking did to my father.
I decided at that moment that this hypnosis stuff must work... would work! I pictured myself driving home to Staten Island, later that day as an ex-smoker. I would not put my son through what I went through. I would quit today. I exhaled the smoke from my lungs, looked at the filter of that Marlboro Light 100, my "friend"… dropped in on the concrete sidewalk, in front of that office and crushed it under my foot.
As I walked up the stairs to the second floor, I did not know what to expect. I had a basic understanding, that hypnosis works with the part of your mind that makes you smoke. I had no idea how the experience would change my life so profoundly and in so many different ways.
The door to the office was open and I walked in and hung my parkas on the coat rack.
The office waiting room was 15’ X 20’. There were a few chairs and a few coffee tables. As I walked around the office, I noticed that the walls were covered with thank-you letters. Some were type written, some hand written all describing the results of their hypnotic experience. It seemed that Al (the hypnotherapist) did more than help people stop smoking; he used hypnosis for a lot more. Although the majority of thank-you letters were from ex-smokers, there were many letters from professional golf players, nail biters, and stutters, along with articles about hypnosis. The information I read about hypnosis made me even more curious and impressed with the subject of hypnotherapy.
This would be my first experience with hypnosis and the questioning and doubt about the hypnosis process started in earnest. The doubt and concern was caused by a part of my subconscious that I now call the “Smoker Part”. This part began to strongly let its presence known, making me doubt if hypnosis would work for me. The inner voice in my head urged me to stop this useless attempt to quit smoking. It was threatened by this process and would do whatever it could to get me to either stop or fail in my quest to quit smoking. I was quite used to my smoker part. Over the past year, I had tried to quit multiple times and it was this smoker part that consistently pushed me back to smoking. That was its job; keeping me smoking and he did it oh so well.
The office was quiet except for the muffed sound of voices from the other side of a door. Behind that door, Al was hypnotizing another smoker and my smoker part and I knew we were to be next. I had mixed feelings with the decision to quit smoking. The logical, intelligent, reasonable part of my mind wanted me to quit, but the smoker in me still refused to let me become the non-smoker I wanted to be. Then the door opened and a woman walked out, thanking Al for all he had done. Al walked out behind her, saying that a thank-you was nice but a letter for his wall would be even nicer.
Al was about 5’5” and 220 pounds. He had a long scraggly beard and wore a “Harvard” sweatshirt. He introduced himself to me after his previous client left and we went into his back office where I was directed to sit. We spoke for an extended period about hypnosis, smoking, addictions and more. He asked me to sit on a recliner with new age music playing in the background. Then it was time for hypnosis.
I pushed back on the recliner and got into a comfortable position enjoying the softness of the leather, as he began to describe relaxing my body, starting from the top of my head. As Al asked me to relax the muscles in my face, my mind had a different idea; it was not going to oblige. Relaxation was not what it wanted; tension was.
“Who is this guy?” the voice in my head said, referring to the hypnotist.
My smoker part was not going to give up this addiction without a fight. As in the past, it threw up more and more walls, trying to make me ignore the truth; that I wanted to and needed to quit.
“Don’t listen to this weirdo!” My smoker part screamed in my head.
“If he is such a great hypnotist, why doesn’t he hypnotize himself into losing some weight?”
“A real professional!” sarcasm dripping from the voice.
“A sweatshirt?”
“Really!”
“How about a shirt and a tie?”
“What if he is a weirdo? I’m not going to close my eyes!”
The sound of the smoker in my head was drowning out Al’s voice.
Then it got even weirder. Instead of one voice in my head; the smoker telling me to continue to smoke and get out of the office, another voice came into my mind.
“Shhhh…” it said,
“You just spent $350 on this. It worked for Nick. You have an opportunity to end your year from hell, right now… and what about Aaron?”
This new voice calmed me; I stopped fighting and doubting.
“Give Al a chance to help you quit; you know it’s what you really want” it said.
This new voice helped me remember what I truly wanted… to finally and permanently quit smoking.
I finally quieted the smoker part of me, and as soon as I did, I felt a wonderful feeling of confidence and resolve wash over me. This new voice replaced the smoker’s voice. It was the voice of my “Healthy Part”, it was very welcome and I embraced it, listened to it and followed its direction.
I quickly started to feel as if I were falling asleep. The more Al spoke the harder it was for me to keep my eyes open. Although I felt a slight tingling feeling and I was slightly cold, I was very relaxed, my thoughts were drifting but I heard everything being said. I found it curious that Al had said that I could not open my eyes and although I tried to open them, I couldn’t. He said I could not raise my arms and again, I tried but couldn’t. I was beginning to believe that it could…. would work.
Being in hypnosis was not what I had expected it to be. I was expecting a feeling like general anesthesia. I expected to feel… different. I expected…
Actually, I did not really know what to expect.
Very soon, I was totally involved in the visual world Al was describing. He had me see a beautiful beach in the summer. I was alone sitting on a chair looking at the horizon.
He then had me see my future as a smoker and it wasn’t pretty.
After what seemed to be ten minutes (which turned out to be fifty) he said that he was going to bring me out of hypnosis. He said that when he said “five” after counting from “one”, my eyes would open and I would be wide-awake.
Amazingly, on the count of five my eyes did open. The process dumbfounded me. I was also concerned that, although I was relaxed and it felt very good, I actually doubted that I was hypnotized; I had heard everything said. I was expecting hypnosis to be a lot more impressive than it turned out to be. I prayed that it had worked, but I was dreading that it did not.
Driving home after the session ended, I was anxious.“When will the urge hit?” I had never driven by myself, in this car without a cigarette burning. Now I was cruising along the Long Island Expressway Westbound, on my way home and I dared to let myself think…
“Can I really be an ex-smoker!” The thought thrilled and scared me at the same time.
“Can it be this easy?” And it was.
“What if it doesn’t work?”
“What if an urge comes? Does that mean it didn’t work?”
The “What-if’s” were being asked all the way home.
I turned onto the entrance to the Verrazano Bridge and as I did a truck without using his signal, cut me off. As my road rage exploded, I felt my blood pressure jump, I cursed, I did a nasty gesture at him with my middle finger and yet, I found two minutes later, that I was laughing.
I looked at myself in the rearview mirror and realized that for the first time in years, I did not light up a cigarette when I was stressed. The urge just wasn’t there! It was not that I was repulsed by having a cigarette; I just didn’t have the urge!
I was an ex-smoker!
Over the next few days I started noticing the ashes, the burn marks on the seat of my car, the yellow haze on the windshield but most of all I noticed the smell in my car. When I got in the car, I realized what I had been subjecting my wife to. I began to realize how discourteous I was as a smoker. I also allowed myself to dream that I actually was an ex-smoker.
That weekend I cleaned my car and the ex-smoker that I am today, was born. To be honest, I had a few urges for a cigarette over the following weeks, but they were easy to resist and by the end of the month, I can say that I did not even think about smoking again. It has been almost 23 years and I can honestly, easily and confidently say that I will NEVER smoke again.
It was my first experience with hypnosis but far from my last. Again, this was before the Internet and I began to read all I could from the library on the amazing topic of hypnosis; the centuries old process that finally cured me of my tobacco addiction.
Little did I know at that time that in fifteen years, I would be going to hypnotherapy school and start a business called,
HYP4LIFE- Improving Your Life Through Hypnotherapy.
If you are a smoker and would like to quit smoking by using hypnotherapy, call me at
(908) 852-4635
Sunday, November 9, 2008
"A Smokers Story; the Smoker’s Wall" Part 2 of 3
Synopsis;
This is the second of a 3-part article, which is about my battle with smoking. In this posting, I describe how the decision to quit was helped by my son. I describe what “The Smoker’s Wall” is and my first attempt to quit smoking. Describing my year from hell as I go through a year of repeatedly trying to quit and continually failing. And how, through a synchronicity, a twist of fate, I learned of hypnosis. How I found a hypnotherapist in Long Island, NY who finally helped me to permanently quit smoking.
"A Smokers Story; the Smoker’s Wall and my Year from Hell" part 2 of 3
A wall forms between a smoker and his loved ones each time they raise the subject of smoking cessation. They want him to quit and be healthy because they love him and even if he knows the dangers associated with continued smoking, the part of his subconscious that is designed to smoke, throws up his "Smoker's Wall". This wall is tall and thick, growing taller and thicker with each plea from a loved one to stop smoking.
My wall was reinforced with each fight over smoking between my wife, Chris and I. She was as aware of the dangers associated with smoking cigarettes as I was, but Chris was a non-smoker, someone who never smoked. My "smoker part" was so strong, that no matter who spoke to me about quitting, Chris, my mother (who quit smoking after my father died), my sister, my son, even if it was my own thoughts about quitting smoking, the wall went up immediately.
That wall is strong, immovable, and impenetrable however, in one loving, unexpected, non-premeditated conversation with my son, in the hallway of our apartment; my smoker's wall came crumbling down. I slowly turned to look at my son; his eyes darted from the cigarette, burning in my cupped hand to my eyes and back again.
"But you smoke, Daddy" he said "and if you get cancer and die, I won’t have anybody to play with". He put his small, soft hands on my cheeks with tears welling up in his perfectly blue eyes, looked into my eyes, shaking his head and said, "Please, Daddy, don’t smoke any more."
I found my "Last Straw". I stubbed out the cigarette I was smoking, took my pack of cigarettes out of my pocket, crushed it into a ball and said,
"For you Aaron, I’m gonna quit, 'cause I love you'".
A smile came across his face as he took my hand and dragged me into our apartment and at that moment I truly felt that I was going to quit.
"Mommy!" he shouted enthusiastically to my wife who had just finished cleaning the dishes in the kitchen,
"Guess what?… Daddy is going to quit smoking! He promised!”
Chris dried her hands and picked up my daughter, Amy who was joining in on the excitement gave me the smile that always made me melt. The whole family was jubilant with my decision to quit. Although I thought I saw a bit of skepticism reflected back to me in the eyes of my wife.
Before Aaron went to sleep that night, he ran over to the recliner I was sitting in and jumped up on my lap. It was late so I picked him up and carried him into his room. Amy was asleep already. As I usually did, I tossed him on his bed as he put his arms up for his "kiss goodnight". As I leaned over him to kiss him on the forehead, he threw his arms around my neck and said, "I love you, Daddy… Remember you promised …no more smoking… OK?"
With a kiss to his forehead, I said, "Promise!" and I meant it!
I closed his door half way and walked into Amy’s room. The stuffed animals seemed to be smiling at me as I quietly kissed my baby daughter goodnight. She was sleeping with her thumb in her mouth and I stood looking down at her. A feeling that every father of a little girl knows, enveloped me. This feeling of love, protection and pride filled me as I thought of not being there for her. I had to be there for my little girl, the way that my wife's dad, who died of a heart attack due to his smoking, was not able to be for his little girl.
Going to sleep that night, many things went through my mind.
“I really HAVE to quit…
I really WANT to quit…
I CAN do it…
I will never smoke again!”
This determination lasted 8 hours, until I was in my car driving to work the next day…
-“My year from Hell”-
I had finally decided to quit smoking but I didn’t know how I would be able to do it. The drive to work the morning after my decision to quit smoking was sheer torture. I was thinking of nothing but smoking and that torture continued for a year. The year was 1984, which was not only a very scary novel, but was also what I called, “My year from hell”. That year I became a professional “quitter”, I must have quit smoking 100 times, I was miserable and I thought the misery would never end.
I was at work at Pathmark one day towards the end of my year from hell and was speaking with Nick, the produce manager. We were both in the same situation, smokers who were married with kids and both desperately wanting to quit. We were both in the break room and as I usually did, took my cigarettes from my pocket and offered Nick one. He refused, saying that he had finally been able to quit!
“What!” I said with a shocked look on my face…
“How?”
He looked at me and with a smirk and a shrug, quietly said, “Hypnosis”.
“What the hell is Hypnosis?” I said, thinking it could be a way I could finally end this painful year.
“My cousin”, Nick began to say, “smoked for 25 years and just like you and me has been trying to quit for years. He heard from his friend, about a guy, who uses ‘hypnosis’ to help people, like us, quit smoking. He said that he went to this hypnotist and he quit smoking in only one session. I waited a month” he continued, “to see if my cousin would go back to smoking, like you and I always do but he hasn’t smoked in over a month and he even said that he’ll never smoke again! So, I got this guy’s number and got hypnotized! And Ga… I swear to God, I don’t even miss them! I haven’t smoked in almost two weeks, but the real crazy thing is that I really believe I won’t smoke anymore!”
I need to digress here a little…
At the time, I had not even heard of a synchronicity, which is, according to Wikipedia (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Synchronicity)
“the experience of two or more events which are causally unrelated occurring together in a meaningful manner. The concept does not question, or compete with, the notion of causality. Instead, it maintains that just as events may be grouped by cause, they may also be grouped by their meaning. In order to be synchronistic, the events must be related to one another temporally so as to rule out direct causation.”
Now, what does that mean? A coincidence may be just that, a curious connection between events, a synchronicity is a coincidence that presents itself to you, for a purpose. That said…
My awareness of hypnosis was stirred, I had heard from a very reliable source, my smoking buddy, that he and his cousin were hypnotized to quit smoking, and it worked. So, my thought process was, if it worked for them, it could… hopefully work for me. However, this was well before the internet. Now you just Google, “Hypnosis + smoking” and you have a thousand hits to choose from. Then I looked in the yellow pages and found nothing.
So, when my niece informed me that she was going to a hypnotist in Long Island, to quit her smoking habit, I almost fell off my chair… What a coincidence! (NOT! No such thing as a coincidence… synchronicity yes; coincidence, no. This was the second.)
My mother won a small NY lotto; her ticket had 5 out of 6 numbers and paid $2000. It was the day after I told her about the hypnosis coincidences and she called and said that she knew I didn’t have the $350 for the session and that she was insisting that I should make the appointment and that she would love to pay for it; it would be my belated birthday gift. It was also the third “coincidence” and I was curiously amused by the weirdness of it all.
The next day at work, I went next door to the pizzaria for a coke and a slice and to look at the magazines Pete, the owner had behind the counter. Waiting for my slice to heat up, I flipped open an old Playboy it opened to a page with a quarter page advertisement which read;
“Learn Hypnosis and get all the girls you want!”
I wasn’t interested in “all the girls”, but the word “Hypnosis” seemed to be twice as large as the other words. I could not believe my eyes. This was the fourth time in so many days that I had been hit in the head by this hypnosis stuff! Now I may be a little thick headed sometimes, but even I had to acknowledge that something I didn’t quite understand was behind this.
I called my niece’s hypnotherapist and made an appointment.
The story continues next week…11/16/2008
"A Smokers Story; Trying Hypnosis” part 3 of 3
This is the second of a 3-part article, which is about my battle with smoking. In this posting, I describe how the decision to quit was helped by my son. I describe what “The Smoker’s Wall” is and my first attempt to quit smoking. Describing my year from hell as I go through a year of repeatedly trying to quit and continually failing. And how, through a synchronicity, a twist of fate, I learned of hypnosis. How I found a hypnotherapist in Long Island, NY who finally helped me to permanently quit smoking.
"A Smokers Story; the Smoker’s Wall and my Year from Hell" part 2 of 3
A wall forms between a smoker and his loved ones each time they raise the subject of smoking cessation. They want him to quit and be healthy because they love him and even if he knows the dangers associated with continued smoking, the part of his subconscious that is designed to smoke, throws up his "Smoker's Wall". This wall is tall and thick, growing taller and thicker with each plea from a loved one to stop smoking.
My wall was reinforced with each fight over smoking between my wife, Chris and I. She was as aware of the dangers associated with smoking cigarettes as I was, but Chris was a non-smoker, someone who never smoked. My "smoker part" was so strong, that no matter who spoke to me about quitting, Chris, my mother (who quit smoking after my father died), my sister, my son, even if it was my own thoughts about quitting smoking, the wall went up immediately.
That wall is strong, immovable, and impenetrable however, in one loving, unexpected, non-premeditated conversation with my son, in the hallway of our apartment; my smoker's wall came crumbling down. I slowly turned to look at my son; his eyes darted from the cigarette, burning in my cupped hand to my eyes and back again.
"But you smoke, Daddy" he said "and if you get cancer and die, I won’t have anybody to play with". He put his small, soft hands on my cheeks with tears welling up in his perfectly blue eyes, looked into my eyes, shaking his head and said, "Please, Daddy, don’t smoke any more."
I found my "Last Straw". I stubbed out the cigarette I was smoking, took my pack of cigarettes out of my pocket, crushed it into a ball and said,
"For you Aaron, I’m gonna quit, 'cause I love you'".
A smile came across his face as he took my hand and dragged me into our apartment and at that moment I truly felt that I was going to quit.
"Mommy!" he shouted enthusiastically to my wife who had just finished cleaning the dishes in the kitchen,
"Guess what?… Daddy is going to quit smoking! He promised!”
Chris dried her hands and picked up my daughter, Amy who was joining in on the excitement gave me the smile that always made me melt. The whole family was jubilant with my decision to quit. Although I thought I saw a bit of skepticism reflected back to me in the eyes of my wife.
Before Aaron went to sleep that night, he ran over to the recliner I was sitting in and jumped up on my lap. It was late so I picked him up and carried him into his room. Amy was asleep already. As I usually did, I tossed him on his bed as he put his arms up for his "kiss goodnight". As I leaned over him to kiss him on the forehead, he threw his arms around my neck and said, "I love you, Daddy… Remember you promised …no more smoking… OK?"
With a kiss to his forehead, I said, "Promise!" and I meant it!
I closed his door half way and walked into Amy’s room. The stuffed animals seemed to be smiling at me as I quietly kissed my baby daughter goodnight. She was sleeping with her thumb in her mouth and I stood looking down at her. A feeling that every father of a little girl knows, enveloped me. This feeling of love, protection and pride filled me as I thought of not being there for her. I had to be there for my little girl, the way that my wife's dad, who died of a heart attack due to his smoking, was not able to be for his little girl.
Going to sleep that night, many things went through my mind.
“I really HAVE to quit…
I really WANT to quit…
I CAN do it…
I will never smoke again!”
This determination lasted 8 hours, until I was in my car driving to work the next day…
-“My year from Hell”-
I had finally decided to quit smoking but I didn’t know how I would be able to do it. The drive to work the morning after my decision to quit smoking was sheer torture. I was thinking of nothing but smoking and that torture continued for a year. The year was 1984, which was not only a very scary novel, but was also what I called, “My year from hell”. That year I became a professional “quitter”, I must have quit smoking 100 times, I was miserable and I thought the misery would never end.
I was at work at Pathmark one day towards the end of my year from hell and was speaking with Nick, the produce manager. We were both in the same situation, smokers who were married with kids and both desperately wanting to quit. We were both in the break room and as I usually did, took my cigarettes from my pocket and offered Nick one. He refused, saying that he had finally been able to quit!
“What!” I said with a shocked look on my face…
“How?”
He looked at me and with a smirk and a shrug, quietly said, “Hypnosis”.
“What the hell is Hypnosis?” I said, thinking it could be a way I could finally end this painful year.
“My cousin”, Nick began to say, “smoked for 25 years and just like you and me has been trying to quit for years. He heard from his friend, about a guy, who uses ‘hypnosis’ to help people, like us, quit smoking. He said that he went to this hypnotist and he quit smoking in only one session. I waited a month” he continued, “to see if my cousin would go back to smoking, like you and I always do but he hasn’t smoked in over a month and he even said that he’ll never smoke again! So, I got this guy’s number and got hypnotized! And Ga… I swear to God, I don’t even miss them! I haven’t smoked in almost two weeks, but the real crazy thing is that I really believe I won’t smoke anymore!”
I need to digress here a little…
At the time, I had not even heard of a synchronicity, which is, according to Wikipedia (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Synchronicity)
“the experience of two or more events which are causally unrelated occurring together in a meaningful manner. The concept does not question, or compete with, the notion of causality. Instead, it maintains that just as events may be grouped by cause, they may also be grouped by their meaning. In order to be synchronistic, the events must be related to one another temporally so as to rule out direct causation.”
Now, what does that mean? A coincidence may be just that, a curious connection between events, a synchronicity is a coincidence that presents itself to you, for a purpose. That said…
My awareness of hypnosis was stirred, I had heard from a very reliable source, my smoking buddy, that he and his cousin were hypnotized to quit smoking, and it worked. So, my thought process was, if it worked for them, it could… hopefully work for me. However, this was well before the internet. Now you just Google, “Hypnosis + smoking” and you have a thousand hits to choose from. Then I looked in the yellow pages and found nothing.
So, when my niece informed me that she was going to a hypnotist in Long Island, to quit her smoking habit, I almost fell off my chair… What a coincidence! (NOT! No such thing as a coincidence… synchronicity yes; coincidence, no. This was the second.)
My mother won a small NY lotto; her ticket had 5 out of 6 numbers and paid $2000. It was the day after I told her about the hypnosis coincidences and she called and said that she knew I didn’t have the $350 for the session and that she was insisting that I should make the appointment and that she would love to pay for it; it would be my belated birthday gift. It was also the third “coincidence” and I was curiously amused by the weirdness of it all.
The next day at work, I went next door to the pizzaria for a coke and a slice and to look at the magazines Pete, the owner had behind the counter. Waiting for my slice to heat up, I flipped open an old Playboy it opened to a page with a quarter page advertisement which read;
“Learn Hypnosis and get all the girls you want!”
I wasn’t interested in “all the girls”, but the word “Hypnosis” seemed to be twice as large as the other words. I could not believe my eyes. This was the fourth time in so many days that I had been hit in the head by this hypnosis stuff! Now I may be a little thick headed sometimes, but even I had to acknowledge that something I didn’t quite understand was behind this.
I called my niece’s hypnotherapist and made an appointment.
The story continues next week…11/16/2008
"A Smokers Story; Trying Hypnosis” part 3 of 3
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